Little girl, Big City

6:30 pm 4.10.08

Scene: a sushi bar in the Valley

The whole thing wasn’t exactly the greatest thing ever.  I’d taken the bus down to meet him.  I was dressed cute and demure.  Looking at the photos now, his interest in me bordered on creepy.  I looked ridiculously young then.  I was ridiculously young.  But maybe it was the blonde hair.

He picked me up from the stop and brought me to a sushi place. He- the A-typical Los Angeles guy: tall with black hair, white tshirt, jeans.  Me- a tiny girl with blonde hair tossed in a low ponytail, spaghetti strapped tank top and jeans.

“Asahi or Sapporo please and whatever else she wants.  Is that alright?”

“Yeah that works.  Thanks.”

The conversation was lacking any depth.  We didn’t sit and have deep conversations about art or philosophy (even though he’s a Taoist so you would guess there would be some room for discussion bubbling upstairs).   We talked about video games, work, travel, restaurants and the day.  We might as well have been talking about the weather.

That was about the most intense it got.

He might have been an on-air personality, but off-air he wasn’t anything special.  Don’t get me wrong, he was a nice enough guy for the time to some regard, but in other ways he was very much so that A-typical California cliche.

It was about everything I expected.. with a few peaks of disaster and/or “my luck” as usual.  We wrapped up the meal and headed back to his place.

“So we’re here now.  What do you want to do?”

7:30pm 11.16.11

Scene: a loft in Gallery Row, downtown Los Angeles

“I know what you two did.  I heard it.  I don’t appreciate it happening.  I told you I didn’t want it happening when I was home.”

I was a doe in headlights.  Yes, we had done the deed but it was when we specifically thought she had been gone.  We felt bad about it.  We felt great about it.  He and I were both in the moment.  It caught us and swept us away.  I couldn’t help but think that whatever it was was a serendipitous intersection to say the least.  What if this was the last chance I had before he moved to New Orleans?  What if I was never going to see him again?

I apologized emphatically to her and texted the suited gent.

“Shit.  She just called me.”

“I know.  You and I are stopping all together.”

My heart sank.  I didn’t want to be in the space.  I had to go home.  To the one place in Los Angeles that rang home the most- with my friends at the Brewery.

I called a friend and left a message.  He was at Mindshare.

“The house of cards fell out from under her yet again and Alice fell with it.  But it was comforting and scary at the same time.  Because this is the all too familiar world that she knew.”

Perhaps we really should have stopped everything that night.  Perhaps it was an omen amongst omens…

Why didn’t I listen?

2pm 9.24.10

Scene: An office sitting in front a computer, Mid Wilshire district Los Angeles

At work, on a break I was checking in to the latest thought bubble when I caught glance of it.  But first, a bit of a back story to the back story.  In my reality, there are mythical creatures amongst us- they are the artists, the entrepreneurs, the ever sparkling ones that when you come across make you believe in magic.  One young man in a far off land called Portlandia is one of them.

This fox made a cameo ages before this grand appearance via a tweet circa December 27th, 2009:

“You’ve gotta have your heart break really hard before you can really know what you want.”

Combined with the endorsement from this magical boy, I looked further to find out that this was also magical company.  I began following her exploits immediately but it wasn’t until this day that I would actually start the path of knowing her outside of that online realm.

I rarely get the guts to approach women.  I’m not sure what happened that day.  Oh I know what it was… it was the allure of pancakes and bacon.  Her tweets popped up as I entered my update.  I fear, I don’t always catch things.  She was talking about how she’d bought a cupcake perfume but it smelled of pancakes instead.

“What kind of person is drawn to a girl that smells like pancakes?”

“Me. I guess it sucks to be you.” I tweeted.

I laughed as the updates continued.

“I should save the pancake scent & wear it after bathing with bacon soap under the solar shower at burning man. Boy, I’d be a hot commodity.”

God I love e-pancakes.

4:25pm 11.12.11

Scene: outside a loft building in Gallery Row, downtown Los Angeles

It was a rushed turn of events.  My friend that I had been staying with previously at the Brewery informed me that the management was on his case about more than just the leaseholders being there.  I had to find another spot temporarily and it was to be immediate.

I’d talked to this woman on the phone the night prior and a bit that morning.  A friend of a friend was extending the favor.  One month to find that new spot.

I can do this, I know I can.

She couldn’t get there to meet me before the game.

“My friend will be there.  He’s staying with me too.  He just graduated.  He’s also staying there temporarily.  But don’t worry, you will like him I’m sure.  Here’s his number.  Call him and he will show you the space.”

The first thought in my head was “Oh great.  He’s going to be an irresponsible kid.”

I shrugged it off.  My friend Steven and I got in the car and headed over.

Admittedly, I had also thought in the back of my head “I hope that he’s cute.”  But the logical me told myself “I really hope that he’s not cute.”

The lofts were nestled next to one of my favorite galleries downtown- The Hive.  It was walking distance from work.

I dialed this boy.

“Be right down.”

Steven and I stood outside the checkered hallway waiting for the elevator to open.  I held my breath as the old black door opened.  Out walked the most adorable man I had ever seen dressed in a black tie, black slacks, white dress shirt and dark shoes.

“Hi, I’m Dan.” he said and shook my hand.

As he turned to unlock the elevator, I looked over at Steven.  I didn’t have to say anything.  He and I both knew.

I took another breath before he turned back around.

“Hi.  I’m Jen.  Nice to meet to you.”

7:50am 10.31.11

Scene: Grand St, downtown Los Angeles

It was only one bus ride away from the Brewery.  Twenty minutes to arrive.  I could practically see the building from the top of the loft I was residing in then.

This was a huge change coming.  It was what my father called his daily regimen: a position in a corporate building located in the center of downtown Los Angeles.  It was what I’d asked the universe for and it was happening.

I thought back to my time in Chicago back in February.  About the story of the stop on the L that formally would announce each stop’s name with “This is” in front of it.

So… this is Grand huh?

I thanked the driver of the bus and walked down the street to the number that would ultimately be my destiny.  I had a destination.  Little did I know that it would be the next important one.

A woman greeted me as I came into the office.  She was warm and sweet.  An angel in disguise.

“[The boss] will be right with you.”

My interview went exceedingly well.

“When will I hear from you?”

“You should hear from us later in the week.”

I smiled and shook his hand.  A suited chap.  My my how I do enjoy gawking at the suited chaps.  (But that’s a different story.)

I felt confident as I walked outside and greeted the crisp autumn air.  Do you know that feeling when you know you absolutely have no worries or cares about anything?  That’s how I felt when I walked out that day.  And that’s why I was humbled and happily unsurprised when I got the email the following day asking me to come in for a second interview.

This is Grand.