Little girl, Big City

3:30pm 2.25.10

Scene: a coffee shop in Culver City

I had become a regular over there.  It was so close to my house.  And why not?  They had free Wifi.  The regulars were hilarious.  The vanilla chai was divine.. and free.  Ah the benefits of having the sometimes affections of a black clothed Mr Midnight barista.

As I walked in, the regulars looked at me and turned away.  They had no clue it was me at first.  It was a success already and it hadn’t even started.

I got in before he did and parked myself by the window.  I had work to do anyway, and he would be a distraction.  This was going to be an undercover mission.  This was to see how much he really paid attention.

I donned a pair of red cats eye glasses and a sky blue wig.  You see, sometimes, dear readers, its fun to be someone else.  I sipped my orange smoothie and cuddled a book.

“Wait a minute, that’s you isn’t it Jena?” one of the regulars said to me.

“Shhh.” I said with a raised finger up against my lip.

“I like it!   Does [Mr. Midnight] know you dyed your hair?”

“No.  I haven’t seen him today yet.  He comes in in a bit. Don’t tell him.  I want to see if he even recognizes me.”

I returned to my book.  I didn’t want to ruin the full out surprise of it all with it being a wig.  The actual details were really unnecessary.

A half an hour later, Mr. Midnight arrived for his shift.  He walked right past me without noticing.  I watched him go through his routine.  Checking into the register.  Talking to the other girl leaving.

“I’ll see you at home.” his roommate chimed at him as she grabbed her keys and walked towards the front with a wave.

Onto stocking the pastry at the counter.  Wiping the counters.  An order made.  Another after that.

It was a quiet night.  He looked bored.  I saw him scroll down on his cell phone looking for something to do.  Looking for someone to notice.  Someone to care.  Some sort of validation for his existence.

The sun lowered in the sky and the blinds needed to be turned so it didn’t blind the patrons.  He shrugged and made a beeline for me.  I saw the regulars look up and cover their mouths trying not to laugh.

“Excuse me can I… wait a second!”

11am 4.16.11

Scene: a living room with white walls,  just outside Culver City

The night before had been filled with a lot of drinking.  It was how we’d started.  It would ultimately be how…

We awoke entangled in arms.  He was the embodiment of a rockabilly dream (or rather, nightmare): tall, muscular, black hair, black clothes, fauxhawk.  He carried himself like a badass motherfucker.  And he was.  Every part of it.  Right down to his initials.

This is the man who would ultimately throw down the dominos that would pave the way to adulthood.  It happened so fast, it was like a blur.  But that doesn’t come until later.

We fooled around a bit in the morning before rushing to get ready for our day.  I was originally going to cover a Sci-fi convention downtown.  We still needed to get food before and after and then onto the place where we’d first met.

He was a secret.  A vice.  A tempting tempting all over the map tomcat that catered to my senses in a way that I should have known how crazy he was before the words even escaped him.  He wasn’t supposed to be there that weekend.  We ignored the caution tape and proceeded anyway.  People do the stupidest things when they think they feel a connection with someone.

At the time. we weren’t even official.  It mattered not.  It was a dive into the deep end, complete with the talks often lead into places they never should have.  It is part of what scared the crap out of me.

“Good morning beautiful.  Do you want to get married today?”